Crafting Your Best Story - Writing Tip #17 - Back Story, Flashbacks and Foreshadowing

Back story is the story that happened before your story starts. As the writer, it’s good to know the history of your characters--what brought them to the place they are now, and how those events have shaped them as characters.

But what you don’t want to do is give the reader all that information up front. This is an error that many beginning writers make. There’s a belief that if you don’t tell me everything about the character and what led up to “where they are now at the beginning of the story”, that somehow I, the reader, won’t “get it.”

A story that is front loaded with back story is boring. If you need the back story to be part of the story, then start your story at the beginning of the “back story.”

Think of back story like salt. You shake a bit on your story as you go along to add flavor. Too much in any given spot ruins the taste.

Let’s look at CLOCKWISE. I start the story when Casey is fifteen, watching a football practice at the school. Every thing before that is back story. How would the opening have worked if I’d spent the first chapter explaining when she started time traveling and how often it happens, and that she accidentally took her best friend back once, all before she jumped and caught the ball? Snoozeville. It’s all interesting information that needs to be told, but sprinkled throughout the story.

Or with TWILIGHT, Edward could’ve sat Bella down and explained the whole history of his life and the vampire clan in the first chapter, just so she’d really understand what she was getting into, but that would’ve made for a dull story.

Likewise with HARRY POTTER. If JK Rowling had started the first book with Voldemort killing his parents and leaving the scar on his forehead as a baby, that would’ve probably been interesting to read, but then we’d have ten years of his life to go through before being called to Hogwarts, and that wouldn’t have been so interesting.

Flashbacks should be avoided. Stories are interesting because they are happening to the character as we read it. Reading about something that has already happened, not so much. It takes a lot of skill as a writer to sustain tension and suspense while writing about something that has already happened (and obviously the character having the flashback is okay.)

Foreshadowing is an important writing tool. You’ve probably heard it said that if a gun shows up in chapter three, it better go off sometime before the end of the book. Likewise, if you want the reader to believe that your character would do something courageous at the climax of the book, you need to show him being courageous in the beginning. In my book PLAYING WITH MATCHES, I wanted one unlikely character to do something heroic that would cost him his life. He wasn’t the hero type but I knew I needed show him facing a fear, so I had him accomplish a scary test of bravery he had to perform for his Hitler Youth group.

In TWILIGHT, we hear about the bear attacks at the sport shop (Mike’s, I believe), before we know for sure it wasn’t the bears.

Foreshadowing is important to help the reader suspend disbelief when the twist happens.

Any questions about the above points? Let me know in the comments.

Crafting Your Best Story - Writing Tip#16 - Chapters & Scenes

If you’ve ever read a book you’ll know that a novel is a series of scenes strung together to make the whole. These scenes are often grouped together to make chapters. So how does a writer know how many scenes to include in any given chapter? How long should a chapter be? What should be in it? If you’re like me, you kind of just go by your gut. I think the chapter should end here. Or here. Or maybe here.  But maybe I should add some more—is it long enough? Or maybe it’s too long? Or????

I had an epiphany a while ago on how to write a chapter. I’m not saying it’s an original idea, just that it was the first time I’d thought about it. It came while reading The Art & Craft of the Short Story by Rick DeMarinis, while simultaneously reading The Atonement by Ian McEwan.

Here’s the epiphany: Chapters are short stories.

A short story is a fictional telling that runs between 500 and 2500 words.  It has a beginning a middle and an end. The beginning, as Rick DeMarinis teaches, drops the reader into a situation that has a history. A chapter has a history (unless it’s the first chapter). The history lies in all the chapters previous, and also in things the writer knows about the back story of the character and situation. And according to DeMarinis, the ending has to illuminate all that has gone on before.

I couldn’t really encapsulate what he had to say about the middle but I’ll say that the middle is comprised of well crafted tension, conflict and detail that propels the reader to the ending.

As mentioned, I happened to be reading The Atonement at the same time, and it occurred to me that McEwan’s chapters are exceptionally well written short stories. When strung together they made a bestselling novel. I took this approach to chapter writing while working on my latest wip. With each new chapter I’d think about the character involved and what was to happen. Like any good short story it must have a creative, intriguing opening line. The middle must be rich with detail and build tension. It can’t have a limp ending.

The beginning of a chapter must hook and the middle go “up hill.” The difference in a chapter ending and a short story ending (or novel ending, unless you want a cliff-hanger), is that you want to stop at the top of the hill, at the height of the tension, if you want to the reader to turn the page and start reading the next chapter.

One chapter ends and the next begins at the top of the bell curve.

I came across this graph from the crafty writer, who drew this to illustrate how to write short stories. I think it works to illustrate how to write chapters as well. 

She describes short stories as a slice of life that when strung together make the whole life story, or in our case, the whole novel.

Of course there will be some story styles when short, more dramatic chapters work, but this is a good principle to keep in mind when crafting scenes and chapters.

How about you? Do you have your own approach to chapter writing?

Crafting Your Best Story - Writing Tip #15 - It's All in the Details

Details make the difference. When I make a second, third, fourth, etc pass on my ms, I'm always on the look out on how I can add details to add dimension. Details are what help to keep our characters and settings from appearing flat and two dimensional.

To demonstrate I'll use THE CAY as an example, re-writing the first two paragraphs here, first without the details, and then again with the details the author, Theodore Taylor, provided.

Like sharks that swim in the sea, the German submarines arrived at night.

I was asleep in our house in Willemstad, on the island of Curacao, the largest of the Dutch island just off the coast of Venezuela. I remember that, in February 1942, they attacked the Lago oil refinery on Aruba, the island west of us. Then they blew up our lake tankers, the ones that still bring crude oil from Lake Maracaibo to the refinery, Curacaoshe Petroleum Maatschappij, to be made into gasoline, kerosene, and  diesel oil.  One sub was even sighted off Willemstad at dawn.

You get the picture--you can envision this, right? The scene is set accurately. But the author wasn't satisfied with just accuracy. He wanted to paint a picture. He wanted to add depth. So he wrote this:

Like silent, hungry sharks that swim in the darkness of the sea, the German submarines arrived at  in the middle of the night.

I was asleep on the second floor of our narrow, gabled green in our house in Willemstad, on the island of Curacao, the largest of the Dutch island just off the coast of Venezuela. I remember that on that moonless night  in February 1942, they attacked the big Lago oil refinery on Aruba, the island west of us. Then they blew up our small lake tankers, the ones that still bring crude oil from Lake Maracaibo to the refinery, Curacaoshe Petroleum Maatschappij, to be made into gasoline, kerosene, and  diesel oil.  One sub was even sighted off Willemstad at dawn.

 This version as found in the book tells us all the same things the first version did, but the details added entice the reader, helping him or her to really see it and want to read on.

Here is a scene from THE ADORATION OF JENNA FOX with the details removed.

I wonder how Lily knows a priest in a mission so far from Boston. We reach the end of the cemetery and come to the wall of the church that borders it. Lily pulls open a wooden door, and  we slip inside. My eyes adjust and I see a domed ceiling and then a crucified figure. Christ. Yes, Christ. I remember. 

Now as the author, Mary E Pearson, wrote it:

I wonder how Lily knows a priest in an ancient mission so far from Boston. We reach the end of the cemetery and come to the great wall of the church that borders it. Lily pulls open yet another large wooden door, and this time we slip inside into cool blackness and the sweet smell of burning candles, mustiness and age. My eyes adjust and I see a domed painted ceiling and then a guilded crucified figure. Christ. Yes, Christ. I remember. 

Ms Pearson's use of detail in this passage not only permits us to fully see/smell/taste the setting, it enlists our emotions--we feel Jenna's emotional process of remembering.

Please note that I'm not saying you should just add a bunch of adjectives and adverbs to your text, though some of those may be useful. The point is to create depth and emotion by adding worthy details--details that enhance the writing, not bog it down.

Stay tuned for next week's post on Chapter and Scenes.

Crafting Your Best Story - Writing Tip #14 - Characters Who Have, uh, Character

Why do we sometimes say that a person we know is "quite a character"? You know the type I'm talking about. This person is distinctive, amusing, mystical, humorous, larger than life,etc. In a word Interesting.

Characters in a book can't be run of the mill. They need to be interesting, so that your readers will want to hang out with them for the course of the book.  No one wants to be exiled to yawnsville when they start reading.

So, how do you make your characters interesting? It's all in the details.

For instance, I wrote a Middle Grade that was based on a story I'd written when I first started writing.  The MC is forced to visit his grandfather who lives in a small town. This is the scene where he meets up with a couple kids down the street. The original reads like this:

  "Hi Tim. It's me Nathan." He didn't say anything.  "I'm here for the summer."

Tim kept silent, narrowed his eyes and glared at me. He finally said, "Nice hair-do" in that sarcastic way where you know he doesn't mean it. What's wrong with my hair? I wondered. My hand instantly went to my head. I had just been to the barber. Then I noticed that Tim hadn't had a haircut in a while. At least not a good one.  

  "Where's Mikki?" I said. Tim stood up. I noted he was tall for eleven, about the same height as me. Then he just walked away. I was flustered at this cool reception and started kicking small rocks in the street, trying to figure out what to do next. Just as I was about to leave, Mikki walked around the corner with two little girls following behind her. 

What's wrong with it?  Well, besides being boring.....oh, that's enough, it's boring!  Who'd want to hang with these people for a whole book?

This is the current version, from IT'S A LITTLE HAYWIRE. You'll notice name changes, a change in the MC's voice and perspective, as well as in the secondary characters. Notice also, the details sprinkled in. 

        I can't breathe. I rest my hands on my knees, feeling stupid. Why didn’t I stop to catch my breath before I rounded the corner looking like a feeble dweeb?        

       Mikki and Mason don’t say a word, just stare at me, eyes narrow and searching.      

       "Hi Mikki. Hi Mason,” I say once I can inhale and exhale again like a normal human being.    

        “Well, if it ain’t Owen True.” Mikki's voice is stretched and thin, like she’s forcing herself to be friendly.       

      Mason's lips turn up in a smirk. “Nice hair-do.”  My hand automatically brushes across the top of my head. My Mom made me get my hair buzzed for the wedding. Mason snorts then gets up and goes inside. Two little girls come out at the same time, skipping down the steps.   

          “Oh crickets,” Mikki says. “Opal and Ruby, you two need to clean up this mess. What do you think this is? A pig pen?” I’m glad she hadn’t asked me. I'd be forced to lie.
            Mikki stands up as if to supervise. She props her hands on her waist and her pointy elbows stick out on either side. The triangular spaces remind me of space shuttle wings. I bet she’d like to just fly off if she could. Get outta Haywire. I feel a little sorry for her then.  Even though I’m stuck here for the whole of August, at least I get to leave when it’s over.

I'm hoping this example explains what I'm trying to say, better than my trying to describe the difference. To form interesting characters you need character arc, felt need, distinctive character voice and details.  How about you? Do you have anything to add? What do you do to give your characters character?

We'll talk more about the need for details in the next post.

Crafting Your Best Story - Tip #13 - Look Who's Talking - What is Voice?

When it comes to writing there are two kinds of "voice": the author's voice and character voice. 

Trying to teach someone how to write Author's voice is like trying to teach someone how to hold onto a slippery amphibian--it's a hard concept to grab onto. Author's voice is the feel of a book, what make's it distinctively one writer's story over another. It's the choice of words and flow; it's the cadence and style.  The elements of voice are hard to pinpoint. Think about John Grisham or Stephen King, Danielle Steele or Helen Fielding (or for YA examples, Stephenie Meyer, J.K. Rowling, John Green, etc)--all great writers, but completely different in style. You know when you're reading a John Grisham book, just what kind of book to expect. Not because of branding, but because of how he writes.

How do you find your voice? By writing. I remember the moment when I realized, Hey, This is my voice! It happened after I had written a lot of different stuff. In fact, I'll admit it happened while writing CLOCKWISE. Everything I wrote before that lack a certain something. Mostly I was copying other writers that I admired. My work sounded a lot like whatever author I'd been reading at the time. Then suddenly, my work started sounding like me.

This doesn't mean a writer can only write in one genre. Once you've found your voice it'll follow you, no matter the genre.

For Character voice,  we're talking about something different. We're talking about what each and every one of your characters talk and act like.  Beginning writers often default to the character voice they know best, their own. They have a very strong tendency to give all their characters their own personality. They all say whatever is said, the way the author herself would say them. Do you know what I mean? Have you done this? 

So when writing character voice, you need to know your characters a little bit before starting. Do they have a chip on their shoulder? Are they depressed? Are they in love? Are they fighters? Or givers?  You need to know something that will shape how your characters speak. See the chapter on Felt Need for more on this.

I just finished a light paranormal YA novel where the main character starts off the story overly self-confident. Of course this attribute is shaken up as the story progresses, but it shapes how she sees the world and it comes through in her voice, whether it's inner dialogue or spoken word.

What I sometimes do in second to final drafts, and what I did with this ms, is go through each main and secondary character's conversations from start to finish, by putting their name in FIND. You should be able to identify each speaker by how they talk, and not just by the dialogue tag.

For instance, in this ms I had three characters vying for the protag's attention (for differing reasons). One character was the boy next door, the guy the MC grew up with. He spoke with a lot of slang like gonna, wanna, and modern vernacular. The main love interest was more formal with his behavior and speech and the one who turned out to be the antagonist was very forward and brash in his encounters with the MC.

As I searched for each of their names, I checked to make sure that each one had his own speech pattern. I had to make some adjustments at this point. It's interesting to note that I wasn't aware of these distinctives as I started the first draft--their characters defined themselves in the writing. I honed in on their differences in the revision process.

 How do you define voice?

Crafting Your Best Story - Tip #12 - The Problem with Pacing

I'm a "tight" writer. I rarely have the problem of having over-written and therefore must go back to a bloated manuscript and cut thousands of words.

This can be a good thing, to be able write with an economy of words...but there is such a thing as too tight.

Which is why I often call my first draft an elaborate outline.

I identified my problem. PACING.

I'm jumping from exciting plot point to exciting plot point, with no room to breath in between. Sometimes this technique is good--it keeps you on the edge of your seat. But in my case I know that I'm not establishing key elements like setting or emotional conflict as well as I could.

I decided I needed to see how other writers were dealing with pacing so I picked a book off my shelf that was on the thicker side, one of our example books, TWILIGHT.  I wanted to see how she handled pacing.

First, it's easy to recall her main plot points: Bella spotting Edward in the Cafeteria; Bella and Edwards first encounter in Biology; Edward saving Bella from getting crushed; the sparkle reveal; the ball game; encounter with James and the beginning of the hunt; the escape with Alice and Jasper; James contacting Bella; her escape at the airport; the dance room scene; the rescue; the hospital; the prom.

If I had written Twilight it would've only been half as long, even while keeping all those scenes.  (And yeah, maybe Twilight could have used a bit of  thinning.)

So what did I notice?

Ms Meyers wasn't in a big rush to get Bella and Edward to meet. Bella arrives at Forks, we meet her dad, see her house, go through a day of school, meet her friends, sure she sees Edward and we find out a bit about him through her friends Jessica's eyes, but we don't actually MEET him until his unusual reaction to Bella in Biology.

My instinct would've been to open with that scene.

Ms Meyers didn't worry about giving us too much detail about setting. Sometimes we'd get two or three paragraphs detailing a room or forest. I tend to worry if I spend too much time describing setting, the reader will fall asleep, but actually it helps a reader to get rooted in a story if they can really see where they are and what's going on. Of course you can go overboard with description, but in my case, I can see that I tend to error on the side of too little.

Her emotional descriptions were generous as well. We understood how Bella and her father were alike, and why it worked for them to live together, we understood her obsession with Edward, and even though we could've probably lived with fewer descriptions of Edward's eyes and the wide swath of emotion that oozed from them, we were left in no doubt about the speed and intensity at which their love affair grew.

She also didn't have a problem with a large cast. There are the kids at school, the Cullen family and a brief encounter with the reservation tribe. They all needed fair description and stage time over the course of the book.

The villain didn't arrive until the last act. That was kind of surprising. I suppose that was part of the twist, although if you paid attention to the prologue, you knew she was going to get hunted.

Speaking of prologue: it was super short. The best kind.

Knowing that Twilight was the first book of a series, I also watched for how she planted clues for book two, since I never know if there will be a book two or a book three.  I wonder how much she really knew in advance about how the story with Jacob and the Quileutes tribe would evolve. Jacob Black plays a really small role in book one, with only his ominous message from his father to Bella at the prom to hint at more conflict to come.

What do you think? Do you struggle with pacing? Either too slow or too fast like me?

Sea & Ocean Love - Can the Garbage Patches be Cleaned Up?

There are five large garbage patches in our oceans - the largest one is in the Pacific and is TWICE the size of Texas!

Though it's wonderful to look at lovely ocean pictures like this:

We can't ignore this:

If you haven't heard, my book SEAWEED is part of a boxed set  called OCEANS DEEP, a project with the goal of bringing ocean awareness and conservation to water lovers everywhere. All proceeds go to theoceanproject.org.

A bargain at 3.99. Get your copy now!

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